Saturday, July 3, 2010

Processing

I have been wanting to write on the blog, but it is hard to know what to say.  Brian is doing great. We went in for follow-up appointments with the cardiologist and the electrophysiologist.  Both appointments gave us a good news that he is healing well and will be able to resume an active lifestyle soon.  We learned more about the devise (defibrillator) they installed in his chest.  I liked the point the nurse made that the AICD is meant to help him get out there and live life not to keep him home.  

On Tuesday, we went to Brian's work as a family.  We wanted to thank the women who responded to the emergency and preformed CPR on Brian.  We also just wanted people to be able to see Brian and how well he is doing.  I know that was really important to Brian and I think it helped him a lot.  He is still trying to piece together all that happened to him.  It was pretty emotional to meet one of the girls that initially saved Brian's life.  I know what I went through and I can imagine what Brian went through, but I realized that the event must have been pretty traumatic for those that were there in a whole different way.

Though I was so excited to have Brian home from the hospital and healing so well, I was unprepared for the tidal wave of emotions that hit me over the next week or so.  There has been much to process.  I avoided the thoughts and fears that were lying just below the surface for a few days.  Brian asked me to share my heart with him--knowing that it must have been hard for me, but it took me a couple of days to be able to do that.  Brian and I were on such opposite sides of this event that it is almost like we experienced two different events.  Never before in our marriage have we not been able to be there together through the trials.  

Still, God is faithful in all of this.  He continues to teach me not to live in fear and to give my cares to him.  Brian feels that God has given him a second chance at life and want to live for what is important.  We see God's glory all around--in saving Brian's life, in walking with us through the trial, in providing sleep when sleep seemed impossible, in the support we've received from the community, in the new depth of love in our family, and in new perspectives.  We are thankful for life–-not only this life here and now, but we can look ahead to eternity because of our Savior who bore our sins on the cross.  

5 comments:

Kathy Rower Van Vleet said...

Praising God for his grace, mercy, healing and love. Y'all are still in our prayers.

Kristi Fox Melick said...

Julie,
You are so amazing for sharing all of this. I am praying for you and for Brian and your families. It is such a testimony -

Laura Young said...

Love you Cous! It is a blessing to me to read about how the Lord has brought you through this horrible time and given you hope, joy, and maybe a fresh prospective of the future. I love you guys very much!

The Bittles said...

Just thinking about you and your family and wanted to say hi and that you are in our prayers. We still pray for Brian and thank God for "making his heart come on again" (hudson's words)

Coree Snyder and Family said...

Still thinking about and praying for your family. Maybe when Bryan gets feeling better we can try out our P-chem experiment when he swallowed some gas that was heavier than air and he had to stand on his head to get it out. :) Love ya!